Journal

A gentle reminder that there’s nothing high maintenance about wanting to feel good in your body – think of this as part of our strategy towards a good, easeful life, not the reward. Over the years, I’ve realised one of my favourite things about my work is seeing how people’s faces, bodies and minds soften after a massage/yoga. Watching in real time how physiological and emotional shifts happen when we remember how to fully relax, receive and rest. Here’s a few slightly humorous takes on my different tribes of massage clients:

Get me on that massage couch
Loyal regulars who have been coming for YEARS – some since I first trained back in 2012. They know I know their body, trust me fully and they have their shirt half unbuttoned as they walk in. Asleep within minutes or have a good cry, feeling fully safe to let it all go. They have their regular appointments booked weeks ahead and relish the time looking forward to it.

The chatters/confessionals
Sometimes a sign of a regular – updating me on their body, family, life. Sometimes a sign of a nervous newbie, unsure of how to what they’re ‘supposed to do’. Sometimes a sign that this is a place where someone finally feels safe and needs to get things ‘off their chest’. If it helps you relax, do chat away. If you’re comfortable not to, I find most people get the most benefit from sinking deeply into the soft sheets and floating away in quiet.

The “I’m not a high maintenance kind of person, I don’t do massage but my shoulder (etc) hurts”
Usually pleasantly surprised. My work isn’t about being high or low maintenance. It’s about feeling good in your body and mind. At ease. Feeling heard – what you say and what your body tells me, and how amazing it can feel when that is heard and supported.

The clenchers
Struggle to relax in body and mind. One of the reasons I offer a footbath and tea on arrival is to begin the relaxation process before you even get on the massage couch. A way to help your nervous system feel safer. These lovely ladies often don’t know where they are holding tension until I put my hands there and then they book regularly after experiencing the benefits.

The sleep-deprived new Mums
Infrequent visitors as childcare is limited but always so grateful and almost always fall asleep. Can’t remember how it felt to be looked after in this way and usually shed a tear or two of gratitude and recognition of how much they needed this. I was you for so many years. My experiences of this life-stage inform so much of how I work to nurture and nourish you.

The “I’m so stressed”/”too busy”
Rarely seen as they’re too busy and can’t see how a massage could benefit them at this time with all their responsibilities and deadlines. When they do come, they realise that slowing down actually gives them greater clarity and creativity, ability to focus and prioritise.

Whoever you are, your body and mind will thank you for taking a little time to replenish in your chosen way. Please book ahead to avoid disappointment and get the dates/times you want!

How did you come to work with Katie?

Honestly? I was Katie’s client long before I was her collaborator. Back in 2022, a mutual friend told me about the Yoga Nidra evenings Katie was hosting. I booked onto a Yoga Nidra and massage experience — and loved it straight away. I’ve been a regular ever since: her Yoga Nidra evenings, her massages (which are genuinely excellent), and more recently her slow flow yoga. I loved it so much that three of my close friends followed suit and became loyal clients too. I even celebrated my 49th birthday with a private Yoga Nidra evening with Katie, inviting two of my closest friends.

It was only about a year ago that Katie approached me about doing some joint work. By then I knew her work inside out — so I didn’t need any persuading. What’s been an unexpected joy is getting to know Katie personally over this past year too. Working alongside someone whose work you already trust, and whose company you genuinely treasure, is a real privilege.

What should we know about Kristin? Tell us about you.

I’m a Clinical Psychologist and a Positive Psychology Coach, and I’ve been doing this work for 26 years. I’m originally from Germany but I’ve lived in Oxford for a long time now — I came over as a student and never left. I’m a midlife woman myself, with a family, so a lot of what I explore in my work isn’t just theory to me — it’s lived.

Outside of work, three things bring me joy. I sing in a community choir here in Oxford — and there’s nothing better than singing in harmony with other people. I swim in open water, a habit from growing up beside Lake Konstanz in southern Germany, where daily lake swims were completely normal (here in the UK, apparently, it makes you a legend). And I love a good thriller — I spend my working life inside people’s inner worlds, then relax by reading about murder. I’m aware of the irony.

What drew you to the line of work you do? Why and what’s your background?

I’ve spent most of my career as a clinical psychologist, including years in Oxford working in specialist NHS services and clinical research. I loved that work. But over time I realised something that quietly bothered me: so much of what we learn in therapy — about our minds, our beliefs, how our feelings and bodies are connected — is stuff most people only ever discover if they end up in a therapy room. And that felt wrong to me. Why should this wisdom be reserved for when we’re already struggling? So my work now is about bringing psychology out of the therapy room and into every day life — making it available to women who are well, but who sense they’ve lost touch with themselves a little.

Who do you work with and why?

I work with women in midlife — and I say that as one of them. So often, we’ve spent years, even decades, caring for everyone else, and somewhere along the way we’ve lost the thread back to ourselves. We’re functioning, coping, holding it all together… but quietly wondering, “is this it?”

I don’t see midlife as a crisis. I see it as a turning point — one that holds huge potential. It’s a chance to take stock, to look honestly at where you’ve been so far and where you want to go next. To start getting to know yourself again. To reconnect with the person underneath all the doing. There’s so much possibility in that — and it’s a privilege to walk alongside women as they find their way back to themselves.

What’s the most useful thing you’ve learnt and apply in real life?

That our brain isn’t neutral. It’s wired towards the negative — it evolved that way to keep us safe, constantly scanning for what might be wrong or threatening. Which was very useful when the threats were predators, less so when it means we end a lovely day replaying the one awkward comment. Left to its own devices, unguarded, the brain will primarily notice what’s wrong and skate straight past what’s good.

So it needs our help. We can gently train ourselves to do the opposite — to pause on the small good moments rather than let them slip by. I try to do this properly now: the first coffee of the day, the lake at dawn, a beautiful harmony in choir. It costs nothing, it takes seconds, and it genuinely shifts how you feel over time. It’s one of the simplest things I teach, and one of the most quietly powerful.

Find out more about Dr Kristin on her website, where you can also book a free discovery call: The Positive Psychologist. Meet Dr Kristin at our free zoom “Breath, body and a little psychology” on Wednesday 16th September 2026, and at our seasonal retreats.

My work is all about softening: muscles, minds, attitudes. Being kind to yourself. Sometimes people find it hard to remember how to be soft, or what softness in the body might feel like. Here’s a short practice that can be helpful to experience softening, help with sleep and find a sense of connection. It can take as little as 90 seconds, or you can linger as long as you like. You can do this standing, sitting or lying down:

• On an inhale squeeze/tense your feet, legs, buttocks. Release on your exhale.
• On an inhale, squeeze/tense your hands, arms, shoulders. Release on your exhale
• On an inhale, squeeze/tense the face. Release on your exhale.
• On an inhale, squeeze/tense the whole body. Release on your exhale.

Repeat as many times as feels good and notice how you feel. Many people find this helpful to do at the start and end of the day to release tension and begin to feel into their body, noticing places of ease and places of tension – and to help release these. Also super helpful as a signal for sleep, physically letting go of the day.

Newsletter 26.7.26

I’m on a beautiful island called Lefkadas, near Ithaka (the name of one of my favourite poems, so beautiful, evocative – and a good reminder of how to live fully). It’s hot! My kids and husband are sleeping like teenagers, as seemingly everyone else. Even at 8am there’s barely anyone around. I’m loving quietly making my coffee, slipping on my shorts and creeping down to the beach on my own. First thing in the morning, the sea is almost completely still, clear and array of barely describable colours. Clear by the shore and then translucent green-blue – like frosted sea glass. Barely a ripple further out in the lapis lazuli mid depths and then in the deep, indigo silk, becoming almost obsidian out at the hazy horizon. At the shore, the wavelets lap rhythmically on white pebbles. I’ve been tuning my breath into the ebb and flow of these little waves. It’s not perfect, but it’s a lovely way to anchor my awareness deeply into my breath. I’ve been imagining the flow of water back and forth, like the breath of the ocean. As though each wavelet up the beach is an exhale of the ocean, stretching the water away from its home. Each time the waves flow back into their home body of water, like an inhale, the ocean filling itself back up. I’ve been playing with imagery of this and I love it. It also works the other way around, the inhale moving up the beach, the exhale moving back to the sea. I know Greek mythology disagrees with me, but I always imagine the ocean, like the earth, as female.

If you’re near the sea anywhere in the world this summer, perhaps you’ll enjoy spending a few moments tuning into your breath and connecting with the ocean (and your own inner currents) in this way. Best in calmer waters!

If you’re intrigued, traditional ujjayi breath, sometimes known as ocean breath, or even Darth Vader breath (!) is a lovely way to set an audible rhythm to your breath for physical or meditative practices. It is considered calming and soothing to the nervous system because it slows the breath down by a slight constriction in the back of the throat – hence the sound – like ocean waves or Darth Vader.

Give it a try by starting the exhale with an open mouth, making the sound you would make if you were to fog a mirror. It’s a haaaaaa kind of sound. Sounds (a bit) like the ocean. Or Darth Vader.  Notice the slight narrowing of the back of the throat. Once you feel fairly comfortable with that exhale, try doing it on the inhale. Tricky but not impossible. You might find it easier to try with the mouth closed and inhale through the nose, then exhale through an open mouth. Or try both through the nose. Try breathing in this way for a couple of minutes and see what you think. Or, if you like my idea, try visualising gentle beach waves, calmly ebbing and flowing and match your breath to this idea of ‘ocean breathing’.

Look out for my new posters and programmes coming to your local area and your inbox in a couple of weeks.

Massage resumes w/c 3rd August and the Monday & Tuesday are already fully booked – book for the rest of that week and until the end of August here.

Love and rest, 
Katie xx

PS Tell me, have you seen the new movie, The Odyssey? I love a Greek epic and am looking forward to seeing it when I’m home. Let me know what you thought!

Also – if you want a greater sense of that connection with yourself, remember to sign up for this free zoom: “Breath, body and a little psychology” – co-led by me and Dr Kristin Bohn, 8 – 9pm, Weds 16th September